Once and then there will be the so-call Bad days of our life... Today, i guess would be one of them.
Gotten a bad sprain, snubbed by friends, quarrelled with dad & gotten Sand Flies bites on the leg...
Sighz...
Daniel Powter - Had a Bad Day
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Saturday, November 8, 2008
About Broken Phase
Many a times in life we have to climb over hurdles and cross over uneven roads... And if we are not careful, we get to fall (graciously or not) flat on our face. I have been "Aunt Agony" to a few friends of mine but it can never work on myself... I guess by now you already knew, i am a "Drama Queen" of sort. Don't worry, i am not the broken wrist counterpart but rather... the Sensitive New Age Guy. Let's talk about the phases of a broken relationship, one that wasn't initiated by you...
Phase 1 -Denial
"No! I don't believe he will do this to me..."
"He still loves me... I know that"
"He must have a reason, could his work be pushing him too hard?"
Phase 2 - Self Blaming
"It must be something i do..."
"Am i not good enough? It must be"
"Something must be wrong with me! Yes! I knew it... It has to me the clothes i wear!"
Phase 3 - Anger
"Who does he think he is! What rights does he have to do this to me!"
"F**K Him! to hell with him n his kind!"
"I hate him!!! Next time i see him, i am doing some damage!"
Phase 4 - Destruction
"Let me drink myself away..."
"Why do anyone care? Let me f**k the world apart!"
"Beer? Wine? Who cares! Just give me whatever"
Phase 5 - Forgiveness
"I forgive you..."
"He must have his reasons enough to be this drastic... it's alright."
"I don't hate him anymore than i do to a stranger."
Phase 6 - Release
"I hope he will be happy wherever he is now. Seriously!"
"Life is such, i still have a family and i still have friends i love."
"We can still be friends..."
I have gone through all this phases myself and experienced what no mortal enemy of mine shall need to go through. Right now, I am at peace with my being... Hatred has long gone and only smiles are left. I had the memories, the beauty of happiness being once together etched within me. Right now, which phase are you going through? No matter which one... just be Happy.
-Leo
Phase 1 -Denial
"No! I don't believe he will do this to me..."
"He still loves me... I know that"
"He must have a reason, could his work be pushing him too hard?"
Phase 2 - Self Blaming
"It must be something i do..."
"Am i not good enough? It must be"
"Something must be wrong with me! Yes! I knew it... It has to me the clothes i wear!"
Phase 3 - Anger
"Who does he think he is! What rights does he have to do this to me!"
"F**K Him! to hell with him n his kind!"
"I hate him!!! Next time i see him, i am doing some damage!"
Phase 4 - Destruction
"Let me drink myself away..."
"Why do anyone care? Let me f**k the world apart!"
"Beer? Wine? Who cares! Just give me whatever"
Phase 5 - Forgiveness
"I forgive you..."
"He must have his reasons enough to be this drastic... it's alright."
"I don't hate him anymore than i do to a stranger."
Phase 6 - Release
"I hope he will be happy wherever he is now. Seriously!"
"Life is such, i still have a family and i still have friends i love."
"We can still be friends..."
I have gone through all this phases myself and experienced what no mortal enemy of mine shall need to go through. Right now, I am at peace with my being... Hatred has long gone and only smiles are left. I had the memories, the beauty of happiness being once together etched within me. Right now, which phase are you going through? No matter which one... just be Happy.
-Leo
About Carrying the Family Line...
Now, what about baby can a grown gay man like me has to talk about. Well, even thou i can't give birth (thank god for that!) i still can have a family right? My little niece has arrived... and those cute eyes are so adorable *swoon*.
My two siblings are already married and have successfully given birth... so very soon i would be bearing the blunt of the questions, "So... When's your turn?"
There's this saying in Chinese,
“不孝有三，无后为大”
So, The question now would be,
1) Do i care about the feelings of my parents?
2) Can i withstand the looks of the society?
3) Would i be able to overcome the agony of traditional thinking?
4) Should i carry on being who i am?
I guess this would be what most of the Chinese gay adults has to go through。
I often quote my mum's phrase in life,
“养儿育女，长优一百”
But i know she's only saying it because she cares... Sigh, all this thinking is making me go round and round...
My two siblings are already married and have successfully given birth... so very soon i would be bearing the blunt of the questions, "So... When's your turn?"
There's this saying in Chinese,
“不孝有三，无后为大”
So, The question now would be,
1) Do i care about the feelings of my parents?
2) Can i withstand the looks of the society?
3) Would i be able to overcome the agony of traditional thinking?
4) Should i carry on being who i am?
I guess this would be what most of the Chinese gay adults has to go through。
I often quote my mum's phrase in life,
“养儿育女，长优一百”
But i know she's only saying it because she cares... Sigh, all this thinking is making me go round and round...
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